Lilypie Waiting to adopt Ticker

Tuesday, July 7, 2009

Life Lessons from a Blackberry Picker: Focus on the Fruit Not the Thorns


We have been living on our property for five years now. Six beautiful acres, half of them wooded, the other half pasture. Last year, we discovered that the large bushes that surrounded our back pasture were actually wild blackberry bushes. I am not sure how we missed it before, but it has been like finding diamonds in the bottom of a sandbox...pure treasure.
The season for wild blackberries start about two weeks before the fourth of July. About every other day, I can go out and pick 2 or more cups of blackberries. During my picking experiences these past few weeks, I have discovered that the act is very much a humorous event for any onlookers (praying that none are humans!) and also a life lesson. I thought I would share a bit with you from what I have learned while picking wild blackberries.
1. Wear big boots with your long jeans tucked inside: Chiggers are nonforgiving. They love me. I can't help it but I am totally sweeeeeeet. You might be too.
2. If you want to work on your tan, wear a strapless tanktop but beware of high branches and thorns that grab to clothing. I learned also that when you make sudden jerky movements from possible insect invasion, the strapless tanktop can completely fall down. Assuming that no farming neighbors can see through the brush, you will be in the clear. Just re-adjust and move on. Focus on the fruit.
3. Gloves would be nice but would completely hinder the proper picking methods. You must feel the fruit in order to pick it right. The soft ripening fruit must be plucked gently at the base. Gloves get tangled in all the thorns. Plus when you jerk and scream from the ants crawling up your arm, you are less likely to drop what is in your hands.
4. Fast sudden movements while in the midst of picking the berries can cause severe damage to the outer epithelial layer of your skin. You might come out looking like you have been in a cat fight..but focus on the fruit not the thorns, you are doing great!!!
5. If you hear a rustle, shudder, scratch, tweek, or shuffle in the wooded area that you are picking, just be very still. It is possible that it could be deer, birds, small rabbits, big rabbits, moles, snakes, or even a skunk.
6. If you smell a skunk after you have heard the rustle, shudder, scratch, tweek, or shuffle, you can be pretty sure it was a skunk. Check to make sure you weren't directly sprayed.
7. It is hard to run fast in large boots with your long jeans tucked in. So, if you hear a rustle, shudder, scratch, tweek, or shuffle and you are convinced that it could perhaps be a mountain lion or bear, be aware that you will not be able to outrun them.
8. Try NOT to predetermine newspaper headlines like, "Woman killed in her backyard while picking blackberries from a wild animal..." It is completely counterproductive. Focus on the fruit. Say a prayer or two. Remember that silly distractions can keep us from really getting the job done....focus on the fruit!
9. If you feel a slight amount of pressure hovering above your head and you think it is just tree leaves resting on your crown, look up! It could be an intricate web of hundreds of caterpillars who have made their temporary home in the branch above you. Do not panic. After screaming modestly with a tight cling to the berry bucket, just hunker down and move along. Remember, focus on the fruit.
10. Finally, when you return from your adventure that has lasted a good hour in the hot smoldering heat, and your shirt is torn, and your arms are bleeding from the thorny scratches, and your clothes are soaked from hardworking sweat, and your face is covered with red smudges from the multiple attempts to swat away the bugs with your berry covered fingers, and your hair is teased from the thorny bushes that grabbed hold with every tuck, bend, and gather under the branches, and you have had to sacrifice a few precious berries from the near death escapes from critter attack, your children might see you come in with your bucket of berries and say, "That's ALL you picked?!!". With a smile full of joy, say, "Yes, my loves, that's it and it was worth every moment". Because when you bite into that juicy fruit and taste its natural sweetness and relish its tangy flavor, it is nothing but sweet satisfaction. It is a dream come true, a moment where you realize that the very piece of fruit you have eaten was created just for you by the God of heaven above, and you are loved, you are special, you are blessed. And this fruit is not just for you, it is for you to share. To spread the goodness to others, to share all your trials and tribulations and yet display the very fruit from the labor, to be an encouragement and joy. Oh..it's not just about the pickin', or the fruit or the thorns or the slim escapes from tethered tangles of vines,it's the whole adventure. It's the process, the before, the during,and the after. And if you can't see it while you are in it, just focus on the fruit, not the thorns. You will get to taste it's sweet goodness when the time is ripe, I mean right.

Saturday, May 23, 2009

Our Friends are off to ET today!!!

We are SOOOOOOOOOO excited for our fellow cub scouting family, the Garners, who leave today for ET to pick up their daughter. She is absolutely beautiful!!
Please lift them up as they travel this week. They have been so blessed to get some awesome pictures and video footage of their little girl, Hope. If you click on the video above, please mute our music at the bottom of the page.
Also, go check out their story...it is an amazing one...click here!

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

A Family Night Devotional



I just found out about this great family devotional book. It is geared toward encouraging you and your family to have atleast one special night a week where you grow together as a family in the Lord and have lots of fun doing it! I am looking into getting a copy for our family! We have family nights on most Friday nights. These are something the kids TOTALLY look forward to. The kids usually get to pick out the meal that we are going to make, including a special dessert. In addition, we pick different activities to do that night which range from watching movies to playing board games and making crafts. The fun about this new book, Catching Fireflies, is that it has done all the work for you. There is no extra planning needed. What fun?!! I have enjoyed that the kids look forward to family nights. I know we are creating memories and a tradition that I pray will carry on to their families one day. I encourage you to FIRST, start a family day tradition...even if it is once a month right now. THEN, check out this new book. I can't say that I have tried it out yet..but from what I have read so far, I am a fan already. Check out their website here.
If you already have a family night going in your traditions. I would love to hear from you. I love to hear what other families are doing!!

Friday, February 27, 2009

Rain, snow, sunshine....

It is getting colder outside. Tomorrow's forecast projects snow. Wouldn't that be lovely? Inside, I sit in my favorite chair...feet propped up onto the ottomon. My cozy warm sweater seems to hold off the chill in the air.
The phone just rang...and ironically it was our adoption coordinator through our agency. My heart sank just a little and I held my breath as I thought...'Is this the phonecall?!!' Unfortunately, she immediately squashed that thought with her introduction, "I am not calling with any great news, just checking in."
oooohhhh ...sigh...time to breathe. I knew it was probably not even possible, but a girl can dream can't she? It would have been nice for, "Shannon, we have some great news. We have your little girl!"
Nope..the news that she brought actually seemed to bring the chill right back. She said that they are possibly looking at even longer wait times. Currently, the time is approximately 1 year from acceptance date. Ours is August 8th. She went on to say that the time from referral to travel has also been extended. It used to be around 5 weeks. Now, it is approximately 4 months. So....let's do some figuring.
IF we get a referral before the courts close for the entire month of August, that would be the end of July, we would not travel until possibly December. IF we get a referral AFTER the courts close...meaning..in September, we are looking at NEXT year before we travel. Are you kidding me?!! It is still just the second month of 2009. Wow. It is highly possible that our little girl hasnt even been conceived yet.
Somedays, I am great with that and other days, it seems like an eternity.
As a matter of fact, it is harder when other newer agencies are able to process more quickly.
Our coordinator also confirmed that when Guatemala and Vietnam closed their countries to adoption, that those people transferred their requests to ET. This all happened after Chris and I had chosen ET but we were not on the waiting list. So, all those folks were able to quickly get in line before us. We almost chose Vietnam or Guatemala...but God led us to ET..instead..knowing our little girl is there waiting on us. It is in HIS hands.
I can't get depressed or sad for very long. There are things to do. Others are doing work on my behalf abroad. I need to get the things done here that must be done. Hi Ho Cheerio! Chin up! Look for the sunshine not the rain (or snow)!

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Partial Update


What a perfect day to catch up on blogging. It is rainy and cold outside. The kids are snuggled in their beds for a nap, and I am snuggled in mine too. I have lost my voice over the past two days. COMPLETELY lost it. It is no where to be found. Sweet little Liam thinks I am playing a game when I whisper to him, so he whispers back. If I am lucky enough to get a hoarse sound out, he copies that too. It is quite funny. Unfortunately the strain on my sweet vocals to call out to my children when I need them or attempt to intervene a sibling altercation has NOT been fun. I am praying for a speedy recovery :).
It has been a couple of months since last blogging and truly not much has changed. So much has happened, but not much has changed. We had some awesome family pictures taken by my brother during the beautiful fall weather. We captured only a glimpse of its beauty in the pics. But hey..we have to have our mug shots in there somewhere, right? I was thrilled with the ones that turned out. Liam was not having a great day, so we were bribing him with candy corn :).
In other news, we have been busy building up the Children's department at our church. It has been a great experience seeing all the new faces coming through the doors and such a sweet experience seeing all the familiar faces. What a great manifold of giftings the Lord has placed in this church. There can be some fabulous and awesome things to come about. I am praying we dont miss a step or skip a beat. We are humbled at the opportunity to be used in this area to advance His Kingdom. Just this past week, I was just overjoyed at the new little faces coming in the doors. My prayer is that they are fed, that they are blessed, that they feel at home. My prayer is that they walk away with the biblical principles that will build them up and equip them.
That is where my heart lies. In the midst of the tools and the building blocks and the roads and paths that lead us in taking this next generation into their destiny. May I be used if only for a season to take part in the investment opportunity of a lifetime!! This is one investment that won't bring disappointment in the changing stock markets or faltering economy. I would love for every servant of the Lord to have a heart for this generation at some point or another. I believe that there is huge spiritual growth in serving the children. Christ encouraged us to learn from them...from their faith. See?!! I cant help it. Hope you are encouraged to participate, to invest, and to take a leap of faith. It is totally worth it.

Thursday, October 30, 2008

Little Man



These pics were taken just last week. Little man woke up with this awesome hair and I had to snap a picture of his preciousness. His hair is usually the same everyday with little or no upkeep. But this day was an exception. I am assuming he had an AWESOME night rolling around in the bed. The next pic is where I found our little man after I could not find him anywhere in the house. I kept calling for him and even peaked into the living room not noticing him behind all the cushions. This is where he perks himself while watching his favorite video--CARS! He is a cutieee!
As I was lying in bed lastnight praying and reliving the days events, I lifted up my little man. He is such a momma's boy. He loves me so much that he sometimes has a hard time letting me share my love to his siblings. He typically will not let me hold another's baby..and sometimes he will try to separate Chris and I when we are in a long embrace after a hard day's work. I am praying that when his little sister gets here that he will be thrilled and not feel threatened...that his little heart will be welcoming and not jealous...that he will be all ready to play with her and not want to pelt her with a toy from across the room :). Pray for that with me. Isnt he a doll?!!

Monday, October 27, 2008

Please Pray for Peace, Respect, and Humility

With all the current adoptions occuring in ET right now, there has been increasing concern over the way some adoptive families are handling the process while in country. Some, if not most, of this is due to the huge variation in agencies sponsoring the adoptions. While some agencies are on the ball with regulations and specifications, some unfortunately are not. The result is a mixed message to the ET culture. One that is beginning to send a negative message. I am posting below a most recent message from Joint Council who helps mediate these adoptions. Please read below. If you are a friend/family who is just keeping up to date with our process, please pray over this situation that peace would reign and that no 'exodus' measures would be taken and ET refrain from adoptions. If you are a family who is currently in the adoption process, please read it carefully and prayerfully consider all that it is instructing the adoptive families to do, and finally if you are a family who has already adopted from ET, can you spread this news and help pray for the future adoptions to go smoothly and that the american families would practice respect and humility while in ET.

October 22, 2008
Joint Council Policy Recommendation
Cultural Sensitivity Regarding Adoptions in Ethiopia

Every adoption is like a rollercoaster for the adoptive parents. There are
always obstacles to overcome and hoops to jump through. But in every
adoption there are also many highs. For most adoptive parents the biggest high
is finally being able to travel, meet the child whose photo you fell in love with
long ago, and holding them in your arms. It is the moment that every adoptive parent
longs for and dreams of. Adoptive parents want to spend every moment with their
new child, learning every little piece of their personality and spirit. Adoptive parents want to show their new child(ren) everything that the world has
to offer them. This being said sometimes it is necessary for an adoptive family
to be respectful of a country's local culture and hold off these magical
moments for a few days. Joint Council feels that this is the case in
Ethiopia.

Very often adoptive families stay at an international, national or
local hotel in Addis Ababa. And fulfilling their long held desires, families often
bring their newly adopted child to the hotel during their stay in Ethiopia..
Many times the adoptive family also goes shopping or sightseeing in Addis
Ababa or another local city or village.

This overriding desire, which is very normal and certainly
understandable, often results in unintended cultural insensitivity to the Ethiopian
government and citizens. With over 3,000 adoptions expected in Ethiopia this year,
hotels and other common gathering places such as shopping areas often see
relatively large numbers of families with their newly adopted Ethiopian child.

Given that the vast majority of American and European families
adopting from Ethiopia are Caucasian or other non-black, the adoptive families and their Ethiopian child are easily distinguished and are often a point of
curiosity among Ethiopian citizens. Understandably, due to misconceptions about
adoption some Ethiopian citizens even look upon American and European adoptive
families with suspicion. Cultural differences in parenting and child behavior are
contributing to this suspicion.

The large number of adoptive families combined with the curiosity and
suspicions of Ethiopian citizens and with cultural differences in parenting and child
behavior, is unfortunately causing unintended yet very significant
concerns among some Ethiopian citizens and the government. Subsequently these
unintended consequences are weakening the work and services being provided in
order to ensure permanent families for the children of Ethiopia. Without
exaggeration, this may lead to the elimination of intercountry adoption as an option for ensuring that every Ethiopian child has a safe, permanent and loving
family.

During Joint Council’s trips to Ethiopia in June and July, concerns
regarding the large numbers of adoptive families, including the Ethiopian child,
staying at hotels and traveling throughout the city were expressed repeatedly
by the Ethiopian government. Significant numbers of Ethiopian citizens have
contacted the government with questions and more significantly with complaints.

During a Joint Council presentation to adoption service providers from the
United States, Italy and France, Joint Council addressed the very important
issue of cultural sensitivities. All adoption service providers we
strongly urged to refrain from utilizing hotels and restricting in-city travel for
adoptive families. Supporting Joint Council’s recommendation was the Network
(a large association of adoption service providers in Ethiopia).

Most adoption service providers that recognized the issue of cultural
sensitivity are following the recommendation. In fact some have instituted
cultural sensitivity policies regarding lodging and in-city travel
prior to the Joint Council recommendation. For example, increasing numbers of adoption service providers have established private guesthouses for adoptive
families. Unfortunately not all adoption service providers have chosen to be
proactive and implement cultural sensitivity policies. Just as unfortunately, many
adoptive parents are insisting on staying at hotels and going shopping in Addis
Ababa despite repeated requests from their adoption service provider, reputable
advocates such as the Network and the Ethiopian government.

It is essential that adoptive parents and adoption service providers
demonstrate respect for the country in which they are respectively adopting and
working. Without demonstrating respect for the country and its people, the adoptive
family is in turn disregarding the culture of their child(ren).
Similarly the adoption service provider is disrespecting the children they seek to
serve.

It is for these reasons and more that we urge adoption service
providers to encourage adoptive parent to please refrain from staying in hotels and
venturing out in public with their newly adoptive children. With respectful
deference to cultural sensitivities in Ethiopia, to the Government of Ethiopia, and
to the people of Ethiopia, Joint Council strongly urges all adoption service
providers to immediately implement policies which incorporate the following
principles Adoptive parents are similarly requested to respect their child(ren),
their birth country and culture and abide by the following principles and
the policies of their adoption service provider.

Cultural Sensitivity Principles and Guidelines

Principles
1. All due care must be given to demonstrate cultural sensitivities
towards the country, people and government of Ethiopia
2. Full recognition of the questions, concerns, curiosities and suspicions
must be given to the Government of Ethiopia and its citizens
3. It is recognized that adopting an Ethiopian child is a "privilege of
giving" bestowed by the citizens and government of Ethiopia
4. It is recognized that every Ethiopian child has a right to a family -
every family does not have an inherent right to an Ethiopian child
5. Actions and behaviors which may not appear to be offensive to U.S.
adoptive parents, may in fact be extremely offensive to Ethiopian society
6. Actions and behaviors seen as culturally insensitive damage the
institution of intercountry adoption and thereby limit opportunities for
children in need to find a family
7. Actions and behaviors seen as culturally insensitive significantly
contribute to the possible elimination of intercountry adoption in
Ethiopia and thereby eliminate the right of every Ethiopian child to a safe,
permanent and loving family

Guidelines
1. Adoption service providers will incorporate these principles and
guidelines into their contractual or policy relationships with potential
adoptive families
2. Adoption service providers will disclose the contractual or policy
limitations related to cultural sensitivities to all prospective adoptive
parents prior to approving an application from the prospective
adoptive parents
3. Prior to taking custody of their adopted Ethiopian child, adoptive
families may reside in a hotel during their stay
a. It is recommended that adoptive families utilize Ethiopian Guest Houses
or a lodging facility operated by an adoption service provider during
their entire stay in Ethiopia
b. Adoptive families who have not taken full custody of their adopted
Ethiopian child may choose to utilize a hotel
i. In such cases the adoptive parents may visit their adopted Ethiopian
child daily at the child care center
4. Upon taking custody of their adopted Ethiopian child, adoptive families
will utilize Ethiopian Guest Houses or a lodging facility operated by an
adoption service provider
5. Adoptive families will refrain from in-country travel with their
adopted Ethiopian child
a. Exceptions to this guideline (#5) are limited to
i. The visa appointment at the U.S. Embassy
ii. Other adoption related events
iii. An emergency situation
6. Adoptive families will refrain from pressuring their adoption service
provider or in-country staff to violate these principles, guidelines
and/or agency polices representing these principles and guidelines